Is your head or your heart leading the way?

The moment when logic screams "stop" but your soul whispers "go"

I am on the home straight of my second book MOAR! Making Work Magic Inside & Out. Six chapters down, two to go, and I have to confess: I'm having a big wobble. Currently writing Chapter 7: Conquering your darkest hours: Rise beyond resilience with brilliance, I'm reliving the 'old stories' that I healed long ago.

Who am I to write about healing old stories when I'm suddenly reliving them?

Who am I to talk about acting with heart when my head is shouting 'not good enough'?

I want to procrastinate, self-sabotage, drown myself in research instead of trusting what I know.

The fear emotions bubbling up are raw and real. The imposter syndrome is doing overtime. And every fibre of my logical mind is screaming: "Who do you think you are to write this book?" But my heart knows different: Marilise, you’re meant for more and more than enough already. Just as you are.

I remember February 2022 when we told people we're moving back to South Africa. We were met with surprise and disbelief. Everyone wanted to know what our reasons were.

It wasn't so much the questions but the way people asked them that triggered me. Every concern was valid, perfectly reasonable fears.

And yet.

My standard answer became: "For all the reasons money can't buy: family, weather, nature, people, connection to something deeper than convenience."

What I couldn't articulate then was this: some decisions can only be made with the heart because the head will always find reasons to say no.

When courage trumps logic

Your logical mind is designed to keep you safe. Your head will analyse every risk, calculate every probability, and present you with a perfectly rational case for staying exactly where you are. It's excellent at survival.

But courage expands beyond logic's limits. When your heart recognises truth your head hasn't processed, transformation begins.

Moving back to South Africa taught me that heart-led decisions rarely make sense until after you've made them.

I'm sharing a throwback photo from March 2019 — me in London, looking polished and successful, ticking all the boxes. I'm posed beside a big heart painted on the wall, my own heart still gathering courage for the decisions that would change everything.

If you'd told me then that in less than three years I'd decide to move back to South Africa, I would have laughed out loud and told you that you're crazy.

Every logical reason said stay. Every heartbeat said go.

Fast forward six years, I am surrounded by mountains and vineyards, and our boys are thriving in a way I could never have imagined. We followed a deep knowing, and it led us home.

The same is true for MOAR! My logical mind says I'm not qualified to write about transformation because I'm still transforming. My heart says I'm perfectly qualified to write about transformation because I'm still transforming.

This moves beyond head versus heart — head and heart in coherence. When both are aligned, magic happens.

Acting with heart in the moments that matter

So here I am, in my own darkest hour of doubt, practicing what I preach: acting with heart in the moment that matters most.

My head wants me to edit for another six months. My heart knows this book is ready to find its people.

My head wants me to wait until I'm "fully healed" before sharing my story. My heart knows that sharing my story is how I heal.

My head wants guarantees. My heart wants growth.

I choose to be ready — I trust in my ability to figure things out.

Now it’s your turn: head or heart?

What decision are you facing right now where your head and heart are in conflict?

• Maybe it's a career change that makes no financial sense?
• Maybe it's a relationship that looks risky on paper but feels right?
• Maybe it's a creative project you'd love to start but keep putting off because you "don't have time"?

The power of head & heart coherence

Eight years ago, I left my corporate job feeling numb, empty and without purpose. Since then, I've spent every day reconnecting with my heart, "getting back into my body, feeling all the feels" and I still get daily opportunities to recalibrate when old habits persist.

I remind myself of Einstein's quote: "The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honours the servant and has forgotten the gift."

When logic serves love instead of limiting it, you make decisions that honour both practical needs and deeper truths. You stop second-guessing every choice and start trusting what you know.

Your heart brings the compass: it finds your true north. Your head maps the adventure. Together, they take bold, brave, and messy action to navigate uncharted territory.

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is stop making sense and start making magic. Sometimes leading with heart is not the reasonable choice, it's the only choice that leads somewhere worth going.

Are you ready to choose what brings you most alive?

I'm sharing these vulnerable moments as I put the finishing touches on my upcoming book MOAR! Making Work Magic Inside & Out (launching early 2025). If you want to be the first to know when it's available, sign up for updates at here.

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