"I just can't seem to stand up for myself anymore"

A Sunday well spent brings a week of content ... we've all heard that one!

As I make my way to the office I am contemplating another week, another day, another opportunity to make a difference, another project to deliver and another positive affirmation ... start the way you wish to continue ... ok here goes ...

"I'm really grateful to be working in this exciting industry with a fantastic team and to have this amazing job that helps me create the lifestyle I love!"

Over and over again, the words, "be courageous, be calm, be caring, be kind" were the words I said as I sat on the train. Yes, I did this every day ... when all I really wanted to do was run away! 

In reality, my situation was eating away at my self-esteem. I was convinced I was the problem and that I must be doing things wrong, am I 'the person' who is not cut out for this role?

Well, that's how I feel after every team update with our leader. Nothing is ever right, there always seems to be an issue. Maybe that's just the way he is wired, his management style. 

All these thoughts rushing through my mind as I navigate the underground and make it out to daylight. Thank goodness for that! I need some fresh air! 

The chatter continues as I mull it all over again. "I just can't seem to stand up for myself anymore, I must be tired. I feel so angry all the time". 

"Pull yourself together now, come on", I say to myself, "you are a successful change leader, don't let yourself be pulled down any more".

"Why do you allow this to affect you so much, reduced to these nonsensical feelings of helplessness?"

"Its because it's my problem," I say ...

"I am alone in this, I have to figure it out."

So why I can't I solve this issue ...

and back to the beginning ... 

I knew this was about the culture of my work environment. My confidence was shattered and I was starting to question my own standards of behaviour and my sense of right and wrong.

Not only that I could see how it was affecting those around me. No one wanted to stand up for each other anymore.

Something had to change.

Been there? 

I would love to hear more about your experiences and would like to invite you to complete my survey or message me with more details about your story.

Please CLICK HERE to complete my survey.

If you want to know a little more about it then please scroll down and read more below.

INVITATION TO PARTICIPATE IN MY STUDY ON WORKPLACE CULTURE

I need your support, please. I am conducting a study for my book, Roar! How to tame the bully, and I would be very grateful if you would participate in my study.

In my eBook, you will have read about my own experience with workplace bullying and its toll on my relationships and my health (mentally and physically). That is why I am determined to help others recognise the signs of workplace bullying early on and to take action before it is too late.

If you have worked in a situation where you have been the Witness or Target of:

1. behaviour that is intentionally negative and malicious, whether physical or emotional, from one or more persons,
2. negative behaviour that is consistently aggressive and persistent, and
3. behaviour that is driven by another person’s desire to obtain control.

Then I would like to invite you to participate in this study.

This survey is being sent to individuals working in organisations across all industries worldwide. Your participation will help assure that the results generated present an accurate reflection of the prevalence of bullying behaviour in workplace cultures today.

TO COMPLETE THE SURVEY - CLICK HERE

The survey is anonymous and treated in the strictest confidence. You may refuse to answer any question or quit the survey at any time. It will take approximately 10-20 minutes to complete.

I’d love to get industry and country-specific analysis too, so the more responses I get, the better, so please feel free to send this link to your colleagues.

Thank you in advance,

Marilise de Villiers

TO COMPLETE THE SURVEY - CLICK HERE

PS: Although there may be no direct benefit to the participant, there are possible benefits to organisations and society as a whole. Leaders, managers, and human resource personnel may learn techniques for identifying, investigating, and managing workplace bullying. Potential benefits to employees would include improved mental, physical and emotional well-being. Raising awareness of workplace bullying could potentially benefit leaders and organisations by increasing employee engagement and productivity.